I find people fascinating. I enjoy hearing about their journeys through life, the challenges they have met and overcome and I love being trusted to a part of that journey and help my clients overcome one of the most challenging of all challenges, especially for those in business –
The Fear of Public Speaking!
For most people in business, the first foray into the arena of Public Speaking, will come when they begin to go Networking and have to stand up and deliver their 60 second pitch. It is often the fear of knowing that they will have to deliver a short pitch that stops people from going Networking in the first place, losing out on meeting new contacts, gaining new business and perhaps meeting that diamond client!
People wonder: If they will have enough to say?
What will they talk about?
If they make a mistake, will they get laughed at? And so much more.
Over the years I have been involved in Networking, I have seen many examples of business owners who really didn’t know what they were doing, because no-one had shown them what & how to do it, and consequently getting a dismal return on their investment and giving up. I’ve also seen people be totally put off from engaging with Networking newbies because they didn’t come across as accomplished, no doubt forgetting that we have all been there, done that etc., at some time.
This is the main reason I created my “Be a Great Communicator” Series of Courses, to teach people how to do these things really well.
Where the Fear of Public Speaking comes from.
In this blog, I want to get into the reasons behind why we have this fear of public speaking, to help you understand that the fear so many of us suffer from can actually be overcome with a few simple techniques that I can help you with. Personally, I use a couple of NLP Exercises that are easily learnt, can be done anywhere and only take a few minutes to do, together with teaching clients how to raise their voice, understand how to construct their speech, be confident in their delivery and so much more.
The most common thing people say to me is that they don’t understand where the fear comes from because they are fine in a 1-2-1 situation but standing in front of a room terrifies them, even though they know their subject. In a 1-2-1 situation, you are on a level par with the person you are speaking to & you are having a mutually interesting conversation. That's easy & we do it all the time.
The Fear of Public Speaking has nothing to do with not knowing what you are talking about.
I believe that our challenge with Public Speaking stems from in our childhood conditioning.
At various times as children, we have been told to either:
a) Be quiet when in the company of adults because they don’t want to hear what we have to say.
b) Not to talk to strangers
or c) Been made to stand on a desk or chair to recite a poem or read so that everyone can see us
and no doubt many other similar things.
The first two commands are frequently repeated to us as small children when we are at the most impressionable time in our development and if this is then reinforced when we are at school and point c is used as a punishment, it is easy to see that we would not wish to expose ourselves in later life to the stress of standing up and talking about ourselves and what we do!
Any one or all of the points above can set up a fear of being in the spotlight, especially when these commands are repeated many times and they become part of our make-up. We become fearful that we will make a mistake and be made to look foolish or be laughed at. Is it any wonder then, that when we are asked to speak to a room full of relative strangers – the other business owners in the room – that we shy away from putting ourselves in the spotlight? There is a great deal of complex psychology going on in our brains behind this, but I’m sure you can begin to now understand where this fear comes from.
Can we overcome this fear?
Getting past this fear is an intrinsic part of the work I do with my clients so I will not be revealing my methods in this blog but I will tell you that one method I use does involve getting in touch with your inner child, who stays with us all our lives and is often responsible, primarily because of our conditioning, for holding us back from accomplishing so much in our lives. That is a much more complicated discussion but when we help our inner child overcome the fear of trying new things, and change our subconscious thinking, we can actually open up our lives in spectacular fashion and make our life very exciting – I have touched on this in previous blogs and there are many great books on this wide subject, written by people well known for their expertise in this field, so I use their teachings for both myself & my clients.
As I said earlier, I use a couple of NLP Techniques to help my clients & I will discuss these further in my next blog.
I hope this blog has given you an insight into how you can overcome your Fear of Public Speaking and as always, I would be happy to discuss with you how I can help you either as your Business Coach or Trainer in the Art of Networking and Public Speaking so that you can be totally awesome at your next presentation!
Questions, Enquiries and Comments always appreciated: email: email@example.com
I look forward to hearing from you soon.